[Ailist] Re: "staying positive"

[Cheri]

Rob,

What elegance in your words!  I love the shift from neg/pos emotions to life-giving emotions. It is aligned with the notion of embracing the whole, stepping back in awareness to seek the potential in the moment and to consciously inquire into--what would bring life/give life at this moment?

Thank you!

Cheri

-----Original message-----
From: "Rob Voyle" rob at voyle.com
Date: Mon, 24 Nov 2008 09:05:41 -0500
To: "Howard Ditkoff" howard at emergentassociates.com, Howard Ditkoff howard at emergentassociates.com, "Michael L. Schwartz" mschwartz at positiveconcepts.biz, "'Cheri'" cheri at mobileteamchallenge.com, "'Plummer, Carolyn'" Carolyn.Plummer at uhn.on.ca, ailist at lists.business.utah.edu
Subject: Re: [Ailist] Re: "staying positive"

Hi Howard.

With respect to emotions the words positive and negative, for me, refer to 
desired emotion and aversive emotions.  those emotions that I prefer to have are 
pleasant, enjoyable, energizing, and motivate (and are the consequence of) 
creative generative responses to those around me.  I would describe them as life 
giving emotions.  on the other hand emotions such as sadness, fear, anger are 
aversive to me.  they rarely motivate creative generative action toward others, 
or they are rarely life-giving, they take more life from me than they give, and my 
actions toward others are not likely to be be life-giving toward them. In fear I 
become greedy and hord resources others could benefit from etc.  The so called 
negative emotions have a tendancy to be self-centered whereas the positive 
emotions are expansive toward others. 

I would not want to get into a good/bad judgment about the emotions as I think 
the so-called negative emotions are important indicators or warning messages 
that something is not right.  However rather than reacting directly from these 
emotions we need to respond from a deeper place of caring for all of humanity. I 
don't know who originated the comparision between "just us" and "justice" but I 
think it is indicates the self-centeredness of the the so-called "negative" 
emotions. For example when afraid groups will only think of "just us" and doing 
so create injustice.  When afraid we need to think beyond the immediate 
situation and respond to the wider needs of humanity and create justice for all. 

My own reflection on the US following 9/11 is that we as a nation became afraid 
and responded in a "just us" way that has been life-taking rather than a life-
giving pursuit of justice for all of humanity.

While we all will die and without getting into issues of an after life I think the use 
of life-giving is still appropriate even in the face of death. Dying is the final act of 
living. As a priest I have been present with many people and families as loved 
ones have died. I have seen life torn from some but I have also seen people die 
gracefully in a way that was life-giving to their families and I believe was life-
giving to them even as their life ebbed away.

Rob
  
Robert J. Voyle, Psy.D.
Director, Clergy Leadership Institute
For Coaching and Training in Appreciative Inquiry
Author: Core Elements of the Appreciative Way 
http://www.clergyleadership.com/
503-647-2378 or 503-647-2382


On 23 Nov 2008 at 9:08, Howard Ditkoff wrote:

> The point I've been trying to make is that the words "positive" and
> "negative" in describing emotions really don't have any meaning. Try
> defining them and you'll find that you have to use other, much more
> specific words, to say what you really mean by them. And you'll also
> find that those other words make clear how much confusion there is
> in trying to label these emotions.
> 
> Why is sadness "negative"? Sadness can be an indicator of a
> situation that you need to leave, leading to a very "positive"
> outcome. Is joy necessarily "positive"? What if you get joy from
> doing something that in the end turns out to be very unhealthy? Then
> was it "positive"?
> 
> It's clear to me that what most people mean by these words are
> simply things that feel pleasant vs. things that feel unpleasant in
> the short term. If all we're after is short-term pleasant feelings,
> then we're basically just preaching hedonism. And I'm sure that
> isn't what we really are preaching.
> 
> For me it, it comes back to health which equals wholeness which
> encompasses everything - pleasant and unpleasant - that helps one
> reach their full potential.
> 
> Best,
> Howard
> Website: http://www.SystemsThinker.com
> Blog: http://blog.SystemsThinker.com


***
Cheri B. Torres
www.mobileteamchallenge.com
865-681-0146