[Ailist] Re: Connecting with Others

[Proteus Communications]

I want to add my appreciation for this thread about hierarchy, language,
authentic communication--and thank you Cheri for drawing us out with your
clarifying questions and attentive listening.  (Cheri your ability to
"listen" through the email brings a whole new meaning to "listserv" in how
you serve through listening!) And I'm looking forward to Kevin's elaboration
on "authentic communication"

I'm also curious to hear more about your phrase "the mind is changed when
the heart is moved."  It's a wonderful description of what happens in
dialogue (in the Bohmian sense)--and I believe this (with all my heart!) 
 
I do have some thoughts to share about this phrase from the perspective of a
developmental psychologist.  

The idea that the mind is changed when the heart is moved is a fundamental
premise of clinical psychologist Gordon Neufeld who has done a lot of
research into the role the limbic/emotional brain (the literal counterpart
to the metaphorical heart) plays in human development and in learning.  He
refers to the limbic centre as the "workhorse" for our maturation--we cannot
learn, adapt, maturate, integrate and reach our full potential as human
beings if we do not experience the sadness and the futility of what we
cannot change, and it's the tears that come with hitting this "wall of
futility" that brings softness, resiliency and adaptability to the brain
(our frontal cortex).   People who have not experienced their own tears
about what has not worked for them in their lives become stuck--their views,
ideas, beliefs about how things "must be" become rigid.  We have become so
averse to tears in North American society that we are breeding generations
of stuck children who grow into stuck adults.  It's very hard to move to
adaptation or to change one's mind when our brains are, quite literally,
"stuck."  

This seems central to our understanding of "dominators" "collaborators"
compromisers...It is very hard, if not impossible, to move from our
positions or "change our minds" without the soft hearts.  So, what are the
conditions under which hearts are moved so that minds can change?

Thanks again everyone for this rich discussion.

Kathryn

Kathryn Thomson
--------------------------
Proteus Communications
proteus at shawbiz.ca
 
Some doors open only from the inside  Hafiz                            

-----Original Message-----
From: ailist-bounces at lists.business.utah.edu
[mailto:ailist-bounces at lists.business.utah.edu] On Behalf Of Charlotte
Henley
Sent: Tuesday, March 11, 2008 11:35 AM
To: Kevin Kervick; ailist at lists.business.utah.edu
Subject: RE: [Ailist] Re: Connecting with Others

Hello to All and Anne,
	Please continue this discussion.  This is providing a meaningful
exchange
of ideas that leads me to understand AI at a much deeper level.  This is all
about AI.  It has been a long time since there has been such a spirited
dialogue... I was eager to get to my emails today to read the wonderful
thoughts and ideas and practical information that is being posted.  I am
savoring every word.... I am challenged to think.  Loving it!
Charlotte Denny-Henley, Student of AI
Open Door Consulting
Huron, SD

-----Original Message-----
From: ailist-bounces at lists.business.utah.edu
[mailto:ailist-bounces at lists.business.utah.edu]On Behalf Of Kevin
Kervick
Sent: Tuesday, March 11, 2008 10:06 AM
To: ailist at lists.business.utah.edu
Subject: Re: [Ailist] Re: Connecting with Others


Hello Cheri:

Thank you for asking.  Before I do so and because the moderator and others
are concerned about focus I want to be sure this is appropriate for this
listserv.  It interests me and apparently you but it may be off base for
others.

kevin


  Kevin wrote:



  Kevin wrote:



  Prevailing notions of peace-making often entail tiptoeing around
differences

  in the search for the elusive convergence of attitudes and values.  But

  without authentic communication, these efforts are pseudo-mutual and
achieve

  little.  The underlying beliefs embedded in this approach are that access

  and authenticity are the only routes to durable change and that attitudes

  are often influenced by emotion - the mind is changed when the heart is

  moved.



  Can you define for me "authentic communication" and say more about what
you mean by "access".



  Cheri

  _______________________________________________

  The Appreciative Inquiry Discussion List is hosted by the David Eccles
School of Business at the University of Utah. Jack Brittain is the list
administrator. For subscription information, go to:

  http://mailman.business.utah.edu:8080/mailman/listinfo/ailist
_______________________________________________
The Appreciative Inquiry Discussion List is hosted by the David Eccles
School of Business at the University of Utah. Jack Brittain is the list
administrator. For subscription information, go to:
http://mailman.business.utah.edu:8080/mailman/listinfo/ailist


_______________________________________________
The Appreciative Inquiry Discussion List is hosted by the David Eccles
School of Business at the University of Utah. Jack Brittain is the list
administrator. For subscription information, go to:
http://mailman.business.utah.edu:8080/mailman/listinfo/ailist