[Ailist] Re: Life Lie/Faking It

[Howard Ditkoff]

>> I find myself moving from what is "positive" to that which is "life 
>> giving"  Just
> being positive is not necessarily helpful.  Fredrickson's work suggests 
> that when
> people's positive to negative emotions goes over 11:1 people cannot engage 
> in
> creative thinking because they have gone into denial, or are no longer 
> accurately
> mapping reality in a helpful life-giving way.

Rob,

Thanks for that reply. I like how Fredrickson gives it a ratio at least, 
showing that we should have some unpleasant emotions going on. I believe 
health is the ability to appropriately feel the full spectrum of emotions. 
My concern with the focus on "life giving" however is the issue of time 
frame. Withdrawal from an addiction is, for many who get through it, 
literally live giving. They get their life back. But it sure doesn't feel 
life giving as the go through the early stages. What about birth itself? 
Literally life-giving. Yet does it feel life-giving? Often it feels so 
painful the mother requires anesthetic. I actually am a little wary of even 
labeling emotions positive or negative. To me they are pleasant or 
unpleasant. But even the most unpleasant emotion can, if worked with in a 
positive manner, lead to positive change. To me it's more the approach 
that's taken being positive than whether the feeling being worked with is 
pleasant.

Best,
Howard Ditkoff
Emergent Associates, LLC
http://www.emergentassociates.com