[Ailist] Re:

Sun May 13 07:00:00 MDT 2007

 "Fake it until you make it" is a suggested strategy given by the voice of
experience to a less experienced person or bewildered newcomer who thinks
s/he has to have feelings and thoughts of certainty and absolute conviction
in order to make progress on the road of life - 

It has been and will be mis-understood - especially if it is taken out of
context.

The curious think about life is we have choices and yet often our head tells
us that we do not or more deviously that wa are not worthy, or not capable
of (whatever) and the like...so this advice of faking it is to trick our own
negative self talk and enable us to do precisely what (deep down) we think
we can do anyway. The standard (old world) British response was to advocate
"the stiff upper lip" pretending to have (by showing) NO emotions or
feelings...

In Australia it is not uncommon for people in similar situations being urged
to "have a go" or "suck it and see".

Our world is increasingly getting inundated with psycho-babble and in my
opinion, this expression cuts to the chase and gives encouragement to a
person to experiment with options.

John Loty
Director
Logistics Training International Asia Pacific Pty Ltd   
A Registered Training Organisation
PO Box 60 Croydon NSW 2132

129 Edwin St. North, Croydon NSW 2132
Telephone 61 2 9799 2214
Fax 61 2 9799 0064
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An Online Course on Appreciative Inquiry starts 14th Feb 2007 Visit
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-----Original Message-----
From: ailist-bounces at lists.business.utah.edu
[mailto:ailist-bounces at lists.business.utah.edu] On Behalf Of Cheri
Sent: Sunday, 13 May 2007 8:01 AM
To: sbelgard at comcast.net; ailist at lists.business.utah.edu
Subject: [Ailist] Re:

Susan,

What a beautiful, gentle and image-ful passage.  

Thanks.  Just reading it centers me and reminds me of how simple this
process can be if we allow it to emerge instead of pushing.

Cheri
-----Original message-----
From: sbelgard at comcast.net
Date: Sat, 12 May 2007 15:59:21 -0500
To: ailist at lists.business.utah.edu
Subject: [Ailist] Re:

I think the minute we categorize something as reality, a lie or fake, we
lose connection to the idea that reality is malleable, that the observer
impacts what is observed.  We think we know what reality IS because we say
what it is not (i.e., we fake it).   If indeed words create worlds, then
we create the world each time we think or speak.  What is there before
speaking or thinking?  We may know ourselves as a set of past actions, but
clearly that is not all there is, and what we do in the future and what we
are capable of doing is wide open.  

To echo Cheri (If we adopted a frame for the human being as a process,
always becoming, then there is not lie--simply a moving into a new state of
being.) and Anna( If we exhibit the behavior, or fake it, aren't we doing
it?)

For me, the Affirmative Topic in an AI process speaks to this very idea.  We
can see a particular possibility and will be working toward it  the seed,
kernel, root or hint of what will fully blossom is present, if only in our
words. 

When I begin working with my coaching or consulting clients, I like to give
them a quote from Tim Gallweys book, The Inner Game of Tennis, which goes
like this: 

When we plant a rose seed in the earth, we notice that it is small, but we
do not criticize it as rootless and stemless.  We treat it as a seed,
giving it the water and nourishment required of a seed.  When it first
shoots up out of the earth, we dont condemn it as immature and
underdeveloped; nor do we criticize the buds for not being open when they
appear.  We stand in wonder at the process taking place and give the plant
the care it needs at each stage of its development.  The rose is a rose from
the time it is a seed to the time it dies.  Within it, at all times, it
contains the whole potential.  It seems to be constantly in the process of
change; yet at each state, at each moment, it is perfectly all right as it
is.

So, wherever one is on the developmental spectrum, it is all reality. (And
maybe the seed we are nurturing is from a different plant all together that
found its way into the rose seed packet.  We'll see!)

Warmly, 

Susan
Susan Belgard, JD, CPCC
Building on the Best in People and Organizations Appreciative Inquiry
Practitioner & Trainer Certified Co-Active Coach Civil Collaborative Law
Trainer Blue Belt Nia. Instructor www.coachingthefullspectrum.com Hour-long
CDs:
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A Micro-training in Appreciative Inquiry"
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Workshops, teleclasses and other events:
www.acteva.com/go/SusanBelgard
susanbelgard at gmail.com
925-899-2333

> Message: 5
> Date: Fri, 11 May 2007 12:15:08 -0700 (PDT)
> From: Anna spector
> Subject: Re: [Ailist] Fake it till ya make it This thread is awesome! 
> I love hearing from some of my favorite people on here!
> 
> I think we should all be allowed to wear a big sign that says "UNDER 
> CONSTRUCTION CHECK BACK LATER."
> I think that the lies for the sake of moving towards becoming 
> something more are helpful, if we are indeed moving forward. If we can 
> match out behavior with our "lies," authentic change can happen and 
> that is truly exciting! I believe in more than fake it until you make 
> it. I think that we don't ever really fake it, I believe that we 
> already know we have the ability to do it, we just lack follow through. If
we exhibit the behavior, or fake it, aren't we doing it?
> Plato used to tell his students that there wasn't anything new to 
> learn, but only things to be discovered that already existed.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Best, 
> Anna Spector 
> MA, Organizational Psychology, Seattle. 
> 
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