[Ailist] I need a new word

[Jane Magruder Watkins]

Dear Don: Thanks for reminding me about Rodgers and Unconditional Positive
Regard! Back in the days of the so-called "Pop" psychology, I read so many
things that have served me well over the years and no doubt enabled me to
grasp the power of AI in the early 1980's when I first met and began working
with David. Things that come to mind along with Rogers are the transactional
analysis stuff (I'm OK; You're OK); Maslow and the other "new" therapist
folks; and I could go on. 

I think that all of those theorists/practitioners were already onto the idea
of wholeness and social construction -- the idea that the ways we categorize
right/wrong, good/bad, success/failure, beautiful/ugly have everything to do
with what we have learned and experienced in our own culture. I remember
particularly my first experiences in Africa and how one day I had the
"ah-ha" experience of having totally changed my "construction" of who is and
is not beautiful! I could go to my library shelf and list all those book
titles from another era that impacted my life. But, I think it would be more
fun to hear from all you out there about the books that have helped you
embrace AI and the whole idea that we will make the world we imagine. 

Some of you have heard me talk about my "Isn't that interesting!" approach
to our work -- i.e., no matter what my automatic response (and I DO LOVE a
good debate - NT that I am), I pause and say to myself, "Isn't that
interesting that s/he feels so differently than I do. I wonder what that's
all about." I know that I got to this place of wanting to understand rather
than to judge because of that long list of people who wrote books and
impacted my life!

Thanks to all of you for your sharing. I am generally overwhelmed with 
e-mails but when I take the time to read them (Ralph says I never delete any
of them!) I am deeply grateful for the generosity in this community of
shared knowledge. 

Jane

Jane Magruder Watkins & Ralph Kelly
Appreciative Inquiry Unlimited
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-----Original Message-----
From: ailist-bounces at lists.business.utah.edu
[mailto:ailist-bounces at lists.business.utah.edu] On Behalf Of Don Austin
Sent: Friday, March 23, 2007 10:58 AM
To: ailist at lists.business.utah.edu
Subject: [Ailist] I need a new word

Hello Mike and All,

> From: Mike Sands [mailto:msands at dccnet.com]
> Sent: Thursday, March 22, 2007 11:49 AM
> To: sfuc-chat at yahoogroups.com; Barbara Davenport; Carol Iwamoto; Cheri
> Torres; Jan Molina; Bob Worth
> Subject: I need an new word
> 
> I need a word to describe a field of study - I think we will have to
invent
> a new word as I don't think it exists yet.  The word might become the name
> of a new social science.
> 
> A working definition of the word will be something like "the study of how
> people elicit feelings of  confidence, capability and happiness in a
> conversation partner".

Carl Rogers researched the work of therapists that held very different
beliefs and approaches. He wanted to find out what they might have in
common, among all of their therapy SUCCESSES. He discovered only one thing
that they had in common in their interaction with their clients (in spite of
their divergent theories and practices). ALL of their successes involved
excellent attention paid by the therapist to the client, and the therapist
interacting with them, AND in such a way that the clients concretely
experienced this presence of this attention.  Carl Rogers chose to call this
"unconditional positive regard."

My work centers around "affirmative interaction," which I have often
mentioned on this list.  A working definition of affirmative interaction is
that it focuses our attention, now, on the most relevant, pivotal, and
valuable aspects of who we are, and who we wish to be, in relationship and
in groups.  

The eight themes of affirmative interaction comprise one way of examining
the kind of conversation that creates feelings and action based in
confidence, capability and effectiveness (which often create happiness).

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