[Ailist] 360 degree reviews

[Arnett, Sarah]

I have found Annette's Simmons book, *Territorial Games*, very helpful with  territorial games and the strategies to address them.

Sarah Arnett


, ----Original Message-----
From: ailist-bounces at lists.business.utah.edu
[mailto:ailist-bounces at lists.business.utah.edu]On Behalf Of Bryan Kidd
Sent: Thursday, July 12, 2007 9:26 PM
To: ailist at lists.business.utah.edu
Subject: RE: RE: [Ailist] 360 degree reviews


Hi Chris, Rob, Richard and all

 

Catching and exposing the games and re-focussing on the work sounds easy,
but the skills to do this are often subtle and built from experience.  As
Chris alludes, the games are often intentionally and subtly camouflaged.  I
have found it useful to keep in mind a few points to assist uncovering such
games.

 

1.       These games are a natural part of human behaviour  

2.       They are psychological defences designed to protect people from
their darkest fears

3.       They are always present in one form or another (perfectionism, for
example, is a defence against the fear of being imperfect)

4.       People using them are seeking to survive

5.       Reducing the fear can help them thrive as well as survive

6.       Fear can't be eradicated

7.       Fear is somehow reduced when it is acknowledged and appreciated
(paradoxically)

8.       To do this as a facilitator, consultant, trainer (or whatever else)
I need to acknowledge and appreciate my own fears

9.       I also need courage to help me expose these games (support of key
players is really helpful here, as Chris says)

10.   Exposing games for the sake of exposure becomes a game in itself, and
so ferments the game playing

11.   Mis-identification of the game also ferments the game playing

12.   Exposure needs to be in service of the task (in the 3600 case, how
does the game impact on performance, or perception of performance?)

13.   Listening to my 'gut' as well as my 'head' is essential

14.   This helps me identify the game, and indicate the time place and
manner of exposure

15.   I need patience, skill, and sometimes luck to do this

 

If these seem cryptic, keep in mind they are the result of a decade of
developing expertise in working with such dynamics.  My biggest difficulty
is marketing such skills; people (clients) often flee from the prospect of
such exposure.  I am developing a Trojan Horse - it is still quite rough and
needs more work (see www.thoughtfulleadership.com
<http://www.thoughtfulleadership.com/> ), but seemed to work in trials.

 

In one recent case, a powerful team member tried to dilute my intervention
at the closing of my last session with them.  Various games had been exposed
in the process, but this member tried to remain apart from this by holding
on to his 'professional' values.  He proposed to the team that awareness of
such games was pointless and useless.  I responded immediately by suggesting
that his statement was a powerful and subtle defence mechanism.  It became
instantly clear to himself and the rest of the team that his game was
central to the performance problems in the team.  They all knew this, but it
was 'unspeakable'.  This intervention could not have been possible if I had
not used my few points above.

 

I am interested to hear how others work with such games?

 

Cheers

 

Bryan.

 

Bryan Kidd, CEO

Thoughtful Leadership.  Activate your power to influence!

www.thoughtfulleadership.com <http://www.thoughtfulleadership.com/> 

 

-----Original Message-----



Chris said:

Unless this gaming is caught early and exposed, you will have a result that
bears no resemblance to the actual facts on the ground.  

 

Exposing the gaming brings with it a set of unique challenges for you 

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